Icky, tricky, sometimes a bit sticky. Sappy, crappy, sometimes very happy. Filling, chilling, sometimes oh so thrilling. Heart of, part of, sometimes, well, the fart of. For better and worse, all of these words describe love. Yet, in rhyming sets of three, such words don’t really do love justice, do they?
The same could be said of our non-rhyming definitions of romantic love. Many of us have lengthy definitions that encompass myriad things. Some of us have short definitions that capture very few. Most of us have exacting definitions that comfort with specificity. Yet few of us have any and/or all of these things as we imagined we would. When we’re actually in love, we can’t help but find our definitions, if not our relationships, lacking. All too often we give up relationships without questioning definitions.
The reality is that no definition can fully capture love and none should. Love isn’t something to be captured in a string of words–it’s something to be discovered in a string of moments. After all, how can we define the intermingling of two unique individuals before they have met? Once we do meet, how can we to live up to our preconceived notions of what should be without altering what could be? Will our definition live on if the relationship dies?
Certainly we can introspectively define our present intermingling(s) from the inside out. Yet, tomorrow is another day that may not play the same way. In these thoughts is one reality of love: It is defined for two by two. It doesn’t live on a page, or even in a predetermined thought or offering of words–it lives and breathes in the moments themselves.
It is here, now, and waiting for us. It’s asking us to let go of definitions that don’t serve us to uncover moments that do. It’s hoping we look past preconceptions to discover possibilities and, perhaps, freedom. Our love of love blinds us to its reality, but we can open our eyes. True love awaits.